Happy Chrismahanukwanzakah

And then there was one....

So when the Fine Print first added the talents of Blue Eagle 3 and White Dragon, I was prepared to take over the world and be the 2004 version of:

These Guys


Instead, they've abandoned my ass, and I've become like this man: (A Man who does not exist!)

Wow

Yes! I finally realized that it would be better if all the links turned up on ONE seperate page, than all opening up a new page. Go Me!

Anyway, back to normal... I STILL can't believe they turned this into a musical!


So, I was looking around www.myspace.com the other day, and saw this actual profile. Look at "her" interests, and please give me the names of all 860 of "her" male friends, so I can slap the shit out of them for being that gullible. (So yeah... the link no longer works, as myspace caught on that there was no way that was a real person. Basically, the interests of the chick were "cock, balls, sex, giving head, being a slut." There were about 860 male believers, trying to get with her. What the hell? Who would ever think that's real? LOL)


By now, everyone knows about the 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon. Well now here' proof: The Oracle of Bacon


So this week has been hell, as the Mets sign the tired, right arm of Pedro Martinez to a 4 year deal, while Oakland trades away Tim hudson and Mark Mulder for C-R-A-P! Don't even get me started on the JKidd-Vinsanity marriage.


Jason Alexander will always be George Costanza to me... and he should thank his lucky stars. I'd hate to know him as the McDonald's douche bag. (This is the best video I've ever had. You MUST watch!)


And finally.... what would a blog entry be without a clip from whatever movie I happened to like this week: "Looks like we got ourselves a bilingual bloodfest"


I've really got nothing this week. Sorry guys... I think I'll take the rest of the month off to replenish my ideas. Have some happy holidays, yall!


On edit: Damn... I'm an idiot... I forgot a picture of the Miami Girls (Jenny & her "posse). I didn't have a picture of them all together... so here they are split up. MG 1 MG 2

1 down... a slugger to go

"Karim Garcia. Who's Karim Garcia? I have no respect for that guy, I don't have anything to prove to that guy. When you talk about Derek Jeter, Bernie Williams, Paul O'Neill, guys like that that you really tip your hat, that you can understand, but guys like Karim Garcia, what? So what? Who are you? Who are you, Karim Garcia, to try to tell Pedro Martinez, a proven player for 10 years?"

Muahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

"Remember He... Used To Drive That Champagne Range"

(Man... he looks just like my San Andreas character!)


You know what I realized this week? Will Smith is probably the luckiest bastard ever! Somehow he made it from this:


to this:


which led to this, this and this:



Unfortunately, then came "Wild, Wild West", "The Legend of Bagger Vance", "I, Robot", and now Hitch (Sigh....)


Ahh.... two new movie trailers for you to watch: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and Be Cool (This trailer came out Friday... and now there's NO DOUBT in my mind that it will be good.)


And Jay-z keeps movin on up. I really didn't see that one coming . Speaking of S-dot, I finally saw "Fade To Black" this week. It's actually one of the first concert/behind the scene movie that I've enjoyed. I came out respecting Jay-Z a lil bit more... (And Memph Bleek a lil bit less)



Jeezus... with this gay-ass trailer it's a wonder anyone went to see this movie at all. (But thank god I did... or else I wouldn't know the wattage of a bolt of lightning)



This gets the "What the fuckin fuck?" distinction. (Yeah, that's two fucks)


What ever happened to the "Problem Child" kid?


I have now seen everything... David Wells is on the Red Sox.
And since we're talking Red Sox... can someone please tell me how this picture actually made it into the Commemorative "Red Sox - 2004 Champions" Sports Illustrated Book? Do they think I wanna see Manny like that?




And finally, I now understand why I was fired last year.

"Never Been To Sesame Street, But I Flip A Big Bird..."

Sorry for the delay in posting, but last week had a hellish start as I had minor head trauma... which I am still recovering from. But don't fret, I will never let my whole 2 readers down.


So I'm dying to see Be Cool, the sequel to Get Shorty. I've heard from some people who have seen the screening, and Vince Vaughn is hilarious... but not as funny as the Rock and the return of the People's eyebrow. Apparently, his character is a musician who is trying to get famous by arching his eyebrow. As if anyone else could play the role? Here's an excerpt from a review of the screening:

"The real star of the film though is The Rock, who steals every single scene he's in. Every one. If there's one reason to see this movie, it's to see The Rock perform a scene from "BRING IT ON". The Rock. Bring It On. Combined. There's also a running gag about how he produced a demo-video of him singing a country-western tune and ... wooo... it's a doozy. If only a producer could get The Rock into a real starring vehicle. The guy has it. "

I'm down with the mini-fro, .... seeing the poster at the theatre, I couldn't help but be laugh.



Ahhh, Camron is back from the pink side of town with some Purple Haze. The album is what it is... which is not saying much since Camron is the artist who started his career by just making up words so his lines could rhyme . He know's no one respected him after that, right? I mean... besides Dipset (his "homies") and lil white boys who want to be a part of ANY set, does anyone like him? Listen to these retarded lines.
Yeah, I didn't think so.



UNBELIEVABLE (Who the hell thought of this, and when does the traveling company come to FL) Wow... just unbelievable


Holy Shit! Popeye was the most racist cartoon ever!


I love the fact that the only non-Knick whose jersey I've ever wanted is BUSTIN ASS this year. I mean.. he was bustin ass before, but he is REALLY bustin ass this year.


Don't you hate when you have to endure a horrible movie, cuz you went with a female friend? Yeah... I had to see Christmas with the Kranks , which might explain how I got head trauma.



As if the original wasn't weird enough... (Look at his hands! WTF?)


Didn't Avril Lavigne say she would never do shit like this? Hmmmmmmm


Yeah, the only good thing about this movie is gonna be the names they come up with. When you say your name is Bobby O'Shea or Chuck Schwartz.... what does that say about you?


Btw, Will Ferrell will have a small role in that film, but thatdid you know that he's not really playing Darrin, in the Bewitched movie? He's actualy playing a guy, who's playing Darrin, in a tv show called Bewitched. Weird remake concept.


Man... The Sport's Guy has really gotten less funny, lately. He used to be great. Look at this from his mailbag in 2001:

"Q. I think that the word "ensuing" is only used after the word "kickoff." It's not often you hear this word used anywhere else. One doesn't say, "After the ensuing dinner, I had some cake." Does the word "ensue" even exist, and if so, when has it ever been used. I feel that this word can only be used in a) gerund form, and b) immediately preceeding the word kickoff. --Justin Singer, Florida

A. I feel the same way about the word "ejaculate." The Webster's definition is "to eject from a living body," yet you never hear somebody say, "Remember the time Roberto Alomar ejaculated that saliva on John Hirshbeck?" or "Was anything grosser than the time Clint Malarchuk had his jugular vein sliced by a skate and ejaculated blood all over the ice?" The word "ejaculate" is only used for specific circumstances ... and I think we know what those circumstances are. If you ever hear the term "ensuing ejaculation," start running."

Ok... i've got nothing this week, it's sad. So I will now leave you with this:

NICE!

"I Roar When We Do It Raw, Like Tigors" - Ron Artest

(I know how to spell tigers... but that's how he says it)




Knuck Su Cow! Knuck Su Cow! (Ya'll know you like that shit)



So... no one's mad at me that I almost bought this at 7:00 AM, the day after Thanksgiving, right?

So apparently, my Mets met with Pedro Martinez on Thanksgiving a la Boston and Curt Schilling last year. While I think dude's arm is about to fall off and he has nothing left... it would be worth it to see Pedro and Mahow celebrating in Mets uni's.


If you're not watching Arrested Development yet, then you better recognize, damnit! Best thing they did was move it to 8:30, so it couldn't interfere with whatever good HBO show is on at 9:00. My favorite character is Dr. Tobias Fünke. Here's a clip. (G.O.B. is a very close second, btw)
Speaking of G.O.B., Will Arnett has also appeared in the Sopranos, and Amy Poehler is his wife in real-life. Strange how the world works.


In other news, Chris Rock is going to host this year's Academy Awards and you can be sure that you won't be hearing this at all. (One of my all-time favs)


So I can't believe the last time I posted was right before the "Ron Artest vs. All of Detroit" saga. I'm sure you guys have heard every detail about that shit.... but who else gives you Mr. Artest's rap debut, from Allure's "I Feel So" track.



Anyway... The biggest tragedy since 9/11 (Sorry if that offends anyone)


I've got 2 announcements to make.
1st: Holy shit.... I actually made Hot Karl's blog-link list. I know it's just courtesy becasue I linked him, but dude doesn't even know... I'm a fan.
2nd: Announcing a new link to the Fine Print library, KC a Jew. Dude's pretty funny if you ask me. Check it out...


Allright... it's been a slow week, being thanksgiving in all... so I'll be back soon, kiddies. Until then....

Keep it dirty,
DPJ

Happy Thanksgiving, people

Eat up....

You Find Me Offensive, I Find You Offensive For Finding Me Offensive!

WHO'S BAD?



Before Flavor Flav, there was James Brown.


This man's named Count Smokula and he was actually on an episode of Blind Date last week. Of course... the lady thought he was nuts... but the comedy level was great. (Though nothing will ever top the 5th Wheel with the guy who sounded like Borat. If anyone's seen that one let me know. Everyone thinks I'm crazy.)


The highlight of my week was seeing this article. I guess being a Cobra - Kai isn't as hard-core as it used to be. (Sigh)


Can't Touch Me! (Just watch the Owl's reaction when he knocks over the trash-can.. I can't stop laughing)


A Ricky Williams sighting! He looks like a broke-ass Mr. T!


I hate the fact that I like "Rain Man" from Eminem right now. It has absolutely no point... but I love rappin this part. (Click for Audio)
"Dr. Dre... I got a question if I may
Is it gay to play putt-putt golf with a friend
And watch his butt butt when he tees off
But uh, I ain't done yet
In football the quarterback yells out hut hut
While he reaches in another grown man's ass
Grabs on his nuts but just what if
It was never meant, it was just an accident
But he tripped fell slipped and his penis went in
His teeny tiny little round hiney and he didn't mean it
But his little weenie flinched just a little bit
And I don't need to go into any more details but
What if he pictured it as a female's butt
Is that gay? I just need to clear things up"


I remember saying "Lean Back" had necrophilic acts performed on it. Well... one more time isn't that bad.


Hmmmm, why do I get the feeling that Dame Dash is gonna be a victim real soon?


Proof that Bush wants a draft.


Is there anything better than a misplaced Christopher Walken scene?


He told ya'll they went back like babies and pacifiers. You didn't believe?


God this bitch is stupid


I can't wait til "Half-Man, Half A Season" (Thanx Chuck) gets traded... Then maybe he'll play the rest of his days in obscurity.


On a side note: I mentioned Pee-Wee Herman last week, and dude was on Conan last night. See the influence I got?


And Finally... who else wants to see Blue Eagle on the shitter?

My Video Binge...

RUFIO! (Dennis, any relation?) Muahahahaha


If you like boy bands or girl groups, you have bad taste in music (It's big so wait for it). (Damn I wish I had thought of that.)


Want to play the drums on your keyboard? Learn how now (I love how this guy counts. One, Two, Tree...)


I just really love this loser's peach fuzz... lol


Tara Reid's nipple slip and the horrible boob job she got. (That's Disgusting)


I think I want one...

Just for Jenny's Jenny

Speaking of Surreal Life, the next season's gonna suck! Here's the cast:
Adrianne Curry (formerly of America's Top Model)
Da Brat (formally of the Hip-Hop world)
Chyna Doll (formerly of Degeneration X... err I mean the WWE)
Some fag Model named Marcus Schenkenberg
Jane Wiedlin (formerly of the Go-Go's)
Christopher Knight (formerly known as Peter Brady)
and finally, Verne Troyer (formerly nothing...midgets always have a job in Hollywood!)


Now back to normal, non-video links:
Mekka lekka hi, mekka heiny ho! (Read to the end... 2 scripts! 2 scripts! Nice)


Damnit, I knew I should've gone to Syracuse


(Insert Evil Laugh Here) Ashlee Simpson's next single is the "I Like The Milky Sauce" song that I mentioned way back in my 2nd post. Nice!


I always knew there was a purpose to that mini-game in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Fall of the Foot Clan game for Gameboy. It was to have someone remake it years later as their own idea. (Play the new version... is that laugh annoying or what?)


One last shout out to Grammy-crasher himself, the Ol' Dirty.


And finally, here's a what a normal night with Blue Eagle and I looks like...(minus the suicide, of course)


Now get the hell out of my office. (Sorry, I couldn't resist)

Damn... Another RIP

You taught me how to like it raw and you and Mariah went back like babies and pacifiers. Keep it real in the after-life, Old Dirty Doggy.

It's Been A Long Time, We Shouldn't Have Left You... Left You Without A Dope Beat To Step To

Sorry for the delay. Between work, two tests, and election Tuesday... I had no time. That's where the two other fuckers are supposed to pick up the slack... but they've abandoned ship. What bitches. A lot happened this week, but I'm late on so much of it I don't have much new to say.


So by now, everyone should know about the R. Kelly/Jay-Z story. If you don't heres what happened. Jay-Z was jealous that R. Kelly was making more money on the project. R. Kelly was jealous that fans like Jay-Z more. So they started hating each other. They go on tour anyway, but now R. Kelly finds different excuses to miss some shows because the crowd isn't to his liking. Jay-Z gets pissed and says to get the fuck off the tour. R. Kelly doesn't... so then Jay's man decides to mase him. How Gangsta! (I'm roliing my eyes right now)

Now from one petty beef... to one ridiculously stupid beef.

Eminem vs Triumph the Insult Comic Dog
It all started way back at the 2002 MTV VMA's (Make sure its not pop-up blocked) Well in response... Triumph made a lil clip called 8 Nipples
So now Em has proved himself to be a lil bitchy about the thing.... with a whole song about Triumph in his new album Encore. It's entitled "Ass Like That". Here's A Verse (Yes... unfortunately the whole song is like that)


Moving on...

It's Time for name that tune! What can it be?

Why waste your time, dude? No way ANYONE believes that. MJ with a razor blade? Hahahahahahah!


Click this Link C'mon, do it... do it... do it.


People wonder why I like Veronica from Real World/Road Rules Challenge so much, even though she's a bitch. Well I have 3 reasons: Reason 1 Reason 2 Reason 3 (None safe for work)


So now that the Star Wars Episode III is out... I can't help but htink back to another great Triumph moment. (Now that's Comedy)


The Transexual Golfer.... WOW


So Bush Won, Kerry lost... Now what are you going to do?
Speaking of Bush... after seeing this picture on Pickin Boogers... I had to find this video.


Did you figure out that tune from before? If not... here it is, boi! (Wow... that whole name that tune thing is, by far, the gayest thing I've done on this site)


And for my final act.. let's watch two of the best news reports ever:
News Report #1
News Report #2

A bowl a day, keeps hunger away...

So once wasn't enough. Here comes Carlito's Way: The Prequel! While I love that Luis Guzman is back... too bad there's no Vigo Mortenson. He had the best line ever... "I can't walk, I can't hump. Go ahead and kill me you cocksaaacker!"


Halloween Costumes:
So let's see how retarded each of us look. (This is payback for you two bitches never posting)

Donkey Puncher J - This costume sucks (Not my fault... I had all of 5 minutes to get ready)
Blue Eagle - Wow (I don't even have a comment. There's too many jokes...)
White Dragon - Awww, how cute (Yep... he's 22 and that's really what he looks like)


Ok... moving on....
I am so wrong for linking to this...


If anyone you know actually tunes in to this... Smack 'em.

Can Real World focus anymore on the gay dudes? Jeezus Christ... they wonder why this is the lowest rated Real World yet.

With his bare hands? With his bare hands? This guy's Nuckin Futs!
and from the same site... What the hell does Batman have to do with parental rights?


And finally, aren't late-night local commercials the best? Some guy goes on TV ranting and raving about his store. Well I love it... and so I leave you with one of my favorites: Somehow he educates you while he's selling! (Click the picture)

Congrats Red Sox... but this is an homage to the MVP

Team? What Team? Manny knows it was all him.
- Doing everything yourself is the only way, my man. LOL




<---- Audio of Manny accepting the MVP (Funny shit)


I Am So Proud of Him (Video)

"We're Brothers... We're Happy and We're Singing and We're Colored"

With White Chicks coming out today, I decided to do you all a friggin service and show you the only scenes that are good. Now you won't have to waste your money on it. Here is the one good scene.


The funniest part of this Usher story has got to be that "Waterfalls" by TLC was playing in the background. What can I say... nigga remembered everything I taught him about a menage.


Goddamnit... my newest slut (remember my 2nd post?) got busted on SNL. I wish I had watched. Muahahhaahaha


The Award for Most Unrealistic Role Ever goes to this guy.


Wyclef Jean is a fuckin idiot.


First "Lean Back" got old... then radio played it out... then white folks killed the song. Now Red Sox fans have have taken the song from its grave, and performed necrophilic acts on it. Disgusting, I tell ya.


Wyclef Jean, I'm sorry. You've been outdone, now you're just an idiot. These guys are the fuckin idiots.


All right.... I'm out like the greasy hair escaping from Pedro's baseball cap.

"Maybe I should rob somebody... then we can be like Whitney and Bobby"

Man I used to love these commercials: Terry's World & Draft Day (The Pain Train's coming baby!)

Rented SNL - Best of Tracy Morgan this past weekend. For a guy who was never really in any sketches, it's actually pretty funny. The highlight... has to be The Adventures of Astronaut Jones. It quite possibly has the greatest sketch theme song ever... watch it... trust me.

So the infamous Bangbus, Fathers of 8th Street Latinas and Captain Stabbin, are apparently perverted assholes. What a shocker! Next thing you know someone's gonna tell me that Arod is a homo! (Thanx Pickin Boogers)

Congratulations to UCF for being the Worst Football team in Division 1-A. It's good to know that Florida's highest paid coaching staff (Yes... more than FSU's) can't even get a win. Great to know my tuition increase was spent wisely.

Best $30 I'm ever gonna spend: Hollywood is Calling

So what the fuck is wrong with Blue Eagle 3 and White Dragon? Neither of those assholes have posted in like a month. I give you guys one week... or I cut you off. No more livin in the lap of luxury for you guys.


And finally... Congratulations to the Boston Red Sox for actually winning. Now hopefully, they'll remember there's still a World Series to play.

I Really Really Hate The Yankees

As we prepare for Game 7... let me take this time to thank God for actually letting the Sox make it to Game 7. But as usual... now that I'm rooting for them... expect them to lose.

With that said... let's have a lil Arod party!

Check out this play from Game 6:
"Arod out on Interference"

Muahahahaha... what a mammoth homosexual! (Not that there's anything wrong with that) Let's look at more Gayrod!










Wow... If that doesn't out him... I don't know what does. I love his reaction. Muahahahha

To make that play worse... listen to the Yankee radio call of that play. "Arod gets robbed!" (Link is fixed now)

And then you wonder why there was almost a riot? What Yankee Shills.... it's disgusting.

I will never ever root for them again! (Lord, forgive me for my 1996 sins)

I'm Strictly Business Just Like EPMD...

Two choruses that I can't get out of my head right now:

Fabolous - Keepin it Gangsta Part II: G-A-N-G-S-T-A, that's how it be when you see me!
Jin (feat. Kanye West) - I Got A Love: I got a love that's better than YOU EVER WAS!


Damn, Pedro... looks like the good luck is running out.


It's about friggin time! Someone has finally listened to me, and broguth back B.A. Baracas. The A-Team movie has arrived. But they better make it right... not like this bullshit.


The best thing I came across was an article in Hot Karl's blog, that literally had me rolling. R. Kelly's Best Of Both Worlds Tour is described... and some things may shock you!


While looking for anything to post, I came across this from my old site:
I'm pretty sure all of you have played Kings Cup (the drinking game)once in your life time. Well, the boys here at The Fine Print have a friend living in Gainesville, that we call Karl Malone. One drunken night we said "fuck the rules", and came up with our own game. Ladies and Gentlemen, put your hands together for the one, the only, Karl Malone Game! (cue theme music) Bascically, you take Kings Cup, and completely fuck up the card values. Here is what each card now means:

2 - The person across from you drinks
3 - Blue Eagle Drinks
4 - You're a whore, drink 4!
5 - Staying Alive, Drink 5!
6 - Sucking Dicks, give out 6!
7 - Upside Down Drink (Put drink behind your back and tween the legs... good luck)
8 - "Masturbate!" (Simulate masturbation, and whoever gets jizzed on drinks, haha)
9 - "9...Waterfall til you blow your mind!"
10 - Forehead Master! (You are now the thumbmaster, except with your forehead... OUCH!)
J - "You're a Mack, give 10 back!"
Q - "You're a Queen, drink 15!"
K - Karl Malone Drinks
A - Steveweiser (if cans) or Rule (bottles)
Joker - DPJ (that's me) Drinks 10 (For some reason, my deck has 4 jokers)

And finally... shout out to Nico at Medianoose. He showed The Fine Print some love when he came upon us during what he calls "BlogNurfing" . You can find his site on the links portion. Thanx for the support, man.

When I first met you, I admit my first thoughts was to trick...

(See these Ice Cubes....)

I dont know whether to laugh at this video or get mad that these guys have a video. It's from the Firemen, whome consist of Teck Money (TheGuy from Real World), 4-Ize (Disturbing Tha Peace), and Kahlil Gibran (of The Sixsense Foundation). But they right... white men do love them some tig bitties.


If you can't find the word "dumbass" in your dictionary... don't worry, I've got the definition right here.


34 never looked good on you anyway, dude.


Anybody remember my very first post in which I said I would watch Envy and Gigli. I finally did it.... well sorta. See... Envy was soooooo bad that I never made it through it. I tried three times, and each time I found myself asleep in less than 15 minutes. Now that's fuckin bad. I'm the fuckin guy who loved Cruel Intentions 2... so if I can't stay awake during the shit... yikes! And Gigli... what can I say about Gigli that's any good?
J-Lo is unbelievably hot in this movie. And not only that, but she's lesbo! To make you think this movie is good, Al Pacino is in it as some crazy asshole and there's a rain-man like retard. However, its not so funny... but it's definitely weird enough for you to enjoy it and not be pissed off.


It's days like today (when I'm bored as hell), that I really wish that Blue Eagle hadn't erased his homeade porn....


RIP, Kal-El (aka Christopher Reeve)

I Can Exercise You, This Can Be Your Phys Ed

Upgrade time and we're here to stay bitches!. As you can see, the Fine Print has a new layout and I want to know what you all think. If it sucks... leave a comment. If it's jumpin off with some hotness... let me know. I love to hear from all the wanna-be Donkey Punchers out there. Ok...Ok.... here we go:


The next party will definitely have some Pac-Man action goin on. ( I really love that movie, btw)


The Governor of California was was one lucky fucker back in his day. No fair... I want to cum all day! (Thanx Ebaum)


I plan on getting tickets to 3 Magic games this year, when tickets go on sale, Monday. The 2 Knicks games, and the one Denver game. These are the seats I want... I'm a get em... no doubt!


Man... Nelly really pisses me off. All this publicity and dude gets a big head. You ain't special, Nelly... make it a double-CD like everyone else! I hate him... I really do.


Einhorn, Finkle... Finkle, Einhorn... (My favorite story of the week, thanks to Hot Karl )


So the NBC show "Last Comic Standing" got cancelled with one episode left. Yeah, the live episode where the comedians find out who won. The show sucks... but that's fucked up! (Now NBC has caved and will tape a finaly episode)




Seperated at birth?

Yes.... That's Lil Jon

(Am I allowed to say something about those lips?)

Announcing a new link on the sidebar... HOT KARL'S BLOG. Dude had my favorite song on NBA Live 2003 Soundtrack, "Blao", and he's a Met fan to boot. Good shit! Between him and Pickin Boogers, you guys should know everything true about Hip-hop. Now on to the posts...


Wow... thanx to Pickin Boogers for pointing this out. I'm still in shock. Gay-ass Willie on the Real World is Hector from the PBS Show, Ghostwriter! I need to start watching the show more.... how come I never noticed that?

Speaking of never noticing... I feel like a dick for not realizing that there are two "TV houses" on my block as we speak. In less than a mile in each direction I have the WB's Big Man On Campus house, and the other way I've got the VoyeurDorm. God-damnit! I need to bonin the broads around here more

Everyone keeps talking about Howard Stern's move to satellite in 2006.. It's great that he'll be uncensored and all, but does anyone remember his Pay-Per-View special a few years ago? That shit wasn't funny.... it was just crazy.


Ok... Movie Preview Time:

Blade Trinity: Trailer Looks like Darkness got himself a goatee. Not so sure If I can like it since it has Van Wilder and Jessica Biel (Who I will hate til she fuckin takes it off!)

Seed of Chucky: Trailer Goddamn! When will it end? Chucky's still a funny bastard, but this shit has got to end someday. They're driving his ass into the ground. Redman's even in the shit! I'd definitely bone Jeniffer Tilly though.

Batman Begins: Trailer You know, I really hated that they made the douche bag from Shaft & American Pshyco Batman, but maybe he's just psycho enough to pull this shit off. We will see, citizens!

RIP Rodney....

The man w/ the one liners. Damn... him and Don Rickles will always be my two favorite old-timers.

Here's some lines in remembrance:

Ladybugs (1992) - "My name is Chester, I'm great, I'm wonderful! Everybody likes me!" (Another man replies: "Hey, Chester. My name is Harlin, and to me you look like a giant asshole.") "Well, if I'm an asshole then I've got a reason. You're contagious!"

"We have a chance. Like a one-legged man in an ass kicking contest."


Back to School (1986) - "Are you fat? When you go jogging, do you leave potholes? When you make love, do you have to give directions? At the zoo, do the elephants throw you peanuts? Do you look at a menu and say 'OK!'? "

"Bring us a pitcher of beer every seven minutes until somebody passes out. And then bring one every ten minutes. "

"What's your favorite subject?" (Girl answers: "Poetry") "Well then maybe you can help me straighten out my Longfellow!" <--- Always a classic


Caddyshack (1980) - "Fore! [then accidentally hitting Judge Smails in the crotch with his golf ball] Oh, I should have yelled 'two'."

"Oh, this your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must've been something before electricity."

"He called me a baboon, he thinks I'm his wife. "




You'll be missed my man. - DPJ

You Can't Beat What You Can't Catch

B-E-N-T-L-E-Y

Yes, NBA Live 2005 is fuckin sick wit it! The Slam Dunk Contest could be a game all to itself. But don't think you have game like me, crackheads.... come talk when you can do the combinations for between the legs twice or a 720° dunk. Then maybe I'll have a lil competition.


Check out Blue Eagle's audition for a role in the new Chuck Norris movie: Motherfucka needs some practice. ( Thanx Ebaum )


Eminem's new song "Just Lose It" is garbage. But I guess that's what you gotta expect from the one white boy with skills, but whose label always makes him write gay songs for pop radio.


Aren't we always happy to see our Grandmama? I know I am


White Dragon's been asking a lot of questions about what puberty will be, so I decided to give him some facts.


Guess who else hates Barry Bonds? Gary Sheffield

And finally.... you gotta hand it to the Asians. They decided that if there's one thing in life we all need to master it should be Mario


(Sorry so short)