Sunday, January 23, 2005

I put the chrome in ya cara, Adios to Manana!


How did I just notice this today?


First things, first... I have to correct an error from last week. I must admit, I had some help in my Best of 2004 list. White Dragon returned from his 5 month observation of the unclean pünt in Costa Rica and Mexico, and came up with two of the categories. So finally... one of my minions pulled his weight around here. Now back to business as usual.


By now... you all should have seen Finding Forrester with Sean Connery, at least once. It's a good movie. Regardless... there is one horribly awkward line in the movie, and it has now immortal internet status. Say What?
From that site, www.ytmnd.com was born, which let's you recreate your own page in the same fashion. Thinking it would be funny, I went there to make a Rocky 4 reference. The problem with that site is... none of the friggin things work after about two views. So now I had to go and make the shit on my own. (Annoying, but strangely fun to make)


Can this really be done? Wait... can they really stretch this out to 13 episodes? I'm talking about Spaceballs TAS, of course.


There wont be any videos, edited by yours truly, this week, because I ran out of space at www.ripway.com (media storage). If anyone knows a good site online to store videos, please leave a comment in the comment box. Thanx


The local news continues to supply funny ass video clips.


Apparently, there's a big-ass blizzard going on up North. Makes me feel kinda bad that I wore a short-sleeve "Brooklyn" T-shirt all day today.


Come one, come all (You will all thank me later.)


Nerds who will turn their children into nerds (I feel like I'm too old to be calling people nerds)


And this is why our President is a genius. He comes up with the most creative nicknames. (I wish I had a sarcasm meter because it's waaaay up there.)


One of the worst photoshopped/internet-used picture I've ever seen. I laughed... and then I felt so so wrong.


Certified Gangsta (but not in that Dipset {aka Karamo} way)


So... after an 0-11 season, UCF decides to start next season off like they finished last, giving Steve Spurrier his first win as a Cock. (Well, that might not be true, since he's always been a dick)


I've seen this somewhere else before.. but it really makes me laugh. His voice going from "Sorry, I'm about to end this" to "Gggaaahhh" kills me.


I don't really think the clip is that funny... but this is what American Idol looks like in England.


Ok.... I'm out. Jenny, this is for you: A better pic of the Miami Girls

<----- Click if you have no clue about this week's title

Sunday, January 16, 2005

Vocabulary's Necessary, When Digging Into My Library

(Click to hear a clip)


My favorite baseball video game just got waaaaaay better. Plus... the cover is great too.


Ouch! (Too bad that whole thing was staged by the Wiz)


There is no way in hell that this is real.


Talk about a quick trigger. Goddamn!


Another Borat sighting (Not the singing the National Anthem story)


This man is absolutely right to say "No" to that shit. (Mmmm, Mmmm bitch! Read that article!)


Ok... so I feel totally left out, because everyone else's blog has done a Best of 2004 list for something or another. So now, waaaaaaaay late, here's mine:

The Best of 2004

Best R. Kelly song in which he turns a woman into an object:
"Feeling You In Stereo" - Best Of Both Worlds:Unfinished Business
- So after hits like "You Remind Me" and "Ignition", you just knew R. was due for another song. And he doesn't disappoint with "Feeling You In Stereo". Look at these lyrics

Best Cameo in each others movies by either Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Luke Wilson, or Vince Vaughn"
Ben Stiller as Spanish Language News Anchor - "Anchorman" ( Link )
I mean... a blind person could see that cameo coming, but I wasn't expecting the Mexican angle. Bravo... Bravo

Best lip sync by someone pretending to be a music artist:
Eminem performing "Mosh" - Saturday Night Live ( Link )
You thought this was going to Ashlee Simpson didn't you? While her SNL gaffe was widely talked about... this asshole did the same thing, THE VERY NEXT SATURDAY! I'm tired of hearing people praising his ass. He has a fuckin Grammy nomination for "Just Lose It"! That alone should have him blackballed by the industry. Ughhhhhhhh


Best person that should not be famous:
M. Night Shyamalan - The Village ( Link )
The "Sixth Sense" was how many years ago, people? We should not be thinking this guy makes good movies anymore. No one should be excited to see one. He should not get any play on E!. Trust me... this was not one of those movies where I was expecting to be scared. But the fact that I guessed the ending 25 minutes in... just shows how predictable he's become.


Best person who should not be getting as close to famous as he is already getting:
Guerilla Black - Guerilla City ( Link)
I can't stand gimmicks. If you can't get here on your own.... you don't deserve to be here, nuff said!


And finally...

Stupidest stunt done by a minority so white people can say "See, I knew these people can't control themselves" :
The Vibe Awards Stabbing ( Link )
You know... white people were starting to like Dre.... and then this shit had to happen. You know... hip-hop is never going to be respected as long as these ignorant fucks are happy with being so ignorant. I hate how true the saying "Ignorance is bliss" is.


Ok, now that that crappy ass list is over, here's one last link.



Even after Beltran, the Mets get no respect. (Funny as hell , though)


Late Addition: Best Music Video by some douche bag with no talent

3 points about this video:

1.) I wish the 80's aerobics trend was back

2.) This is the best video for a song with only 3 words, EVER

3.) I have no clue who sings this song, btw




Sunday, January 09, 2005

"I could be by myself and enjoy the company" - Kanye West




Where do I begin people? It's been a long motherfuckin time!

Let's start with your boy, Young Hova. Goddamn! Someone needs to start a rumor like this (Replacement Link) about my ass. I'm like a Cream Soda bottle! I swear! (Too bad about Jadakiss though... HAHAHAHAAHAHA)

Speaking of Jay-Z... how did "Nigga Please" off of the Blueprint 2 album not make it big? I fuckin love that song... it's still my damn cell ringtone.


Now I'm giving you all a New Year's Gift, as I enlighten you on the return of Charlie Conway and Gordan Bombay (The plot outline is so familiar... I just can't seem to place it. LOL)


My God... you guys don't know how happy I am that I started making fun of Ashlee Simpson way early. Now I feel like everytime something happens... I'm connected. Let's watch Ashlee get booed. My God.. her face is classic! She really thought eveyone loved it. Muahahaha... my lil milky sauce whore.... I love her.


You know when I told ya'll that Flavor Flav and Brigitte were getting their own spinoff, no one believed me. Now everyone acts like there was no question about the shit. First episode is tonight.... I'll be watching. FLAVOR FLAV!

Surreal Life 4 also starts tonight... but unless Mini-Me really steasl the show... I doubt I'll be watching. (After watching... I think I might actually likes this. Chyna is fuckin nuts.... how you gonna gank the midget's room? Quote of the day: "He's gonna have to learn to be a bigger person." That reminds me of that fuckin scene with Chris Elliot and David Cross in Scary Movie 2. "I'll just be the bigger man, and WALK AWAY" Not only that... but a drunk Mini-me is fuckin great. HAHAHAHAHA)


Best Newspaper Headline EVER


How bout those Mets? (Spaceballs did the trick, I tell you!)


Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt, have reportedly split up. Please read all these people's comments. If that stuff is true about Brad... WOW... I bet he wished he had a cream soda bottle. :)


BTW... here's another GREAT idea for a movie. Did you sense the sarcasm? Good because that is a BAD BAD idea. Check out some of the ideas for other "reverse racism" movies. Hilarious



In all those Eharmony.com commercials, doesn't this guy creep you out?



More bad movie ideas: Bad Casting and Bad Arnold Impression... this movie is gonna piss me off.


And finally.... one video for you all. Some Doll Play




Saturday, January 08, 2005

This is what Met Fans feel like, waiting for a decision from Carlos Beltran

(New post will be up by tommorrow. Had the flu... sorry for the delay)